Returning to a place of balance and harmony back here in the "real world". It's interesting - I don't feel like I'm returning to my old ways and my old life so much as learning how to sail through life with a new body, a new mind.
It's somewhat tiresome to continually refer to myself and any changes I've made as the "new me", as if I've had a total plastic surgery and have gone into federal witness protection or something. Realistically, despite the fact that it feels like I was away for a lifetime, in reality it really was only ten weeks, and as such the differences I feel are subtle, small things. However, I think in their subtlety they are powerful and important.
Clodagh and I are moving into a new "temporary" home from now until Burninman at the end of August. This is addressing my need to feel like I have some space to paint, a space to settle - my current room is very small for the two of us an feels very temporary, like I can't relax or unwind. Ironically, the place we've chosen to move is even MORE temporary, as we have to move out by the end of August, so really, the only thing I've accomplished is paying more rent and getting way more space in this temporary time. And then right into burningman! Ha! Yeah, I can't see my soul settling down for a while.
Yoga teaching continues to be a stronger and stronger anchor, reinforcing the feeling that I did make the right decision to do the teacher training, even with all of this turbulence and disruption. And as my friends have pointed out, I wanted a change, and now I just have to be patient while the changes settle. But teaching is wonderful - it's the only time I feel totally, completely like I'm doing what I should be doing - even more so than when I'm practicing. I can't get my class under 95 minutes to save my life, but I feel like my students are getting a lot out of my class. I'm not being too easy or soft - quite hard, I think - but still light and maybe (hopefully) a bit funny. And the dialog is solid! I'm surprised when I go back and look at the dialog how close to verbatim I'm doing!
Reading over the last few weeks of posts, it's difficult not to notice how DRY everything has become. Hopefully that will pass, I don't think it's my nature to be boring.