Juice Fast Progress

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt

Not only has tonight's evening class been cancelled, but tomorrow's morning class has been cancelled as well. It's ironic - just as I started to get over the hump and started to feel like I was able to approach classes with integrity and strength - without fear - we have no classes!!! And of course all that fear needed a place to go, so I'm spinning around in my head... what if training gets cancelled? Rumors are spreading - mostly the fire code/occupancy violation rumor, which is a bit scary due to its basic unfixability - but also at least one of the "Bikram's computers were being taken out of the business for investigation" rumors floated up to our apartment earlier.

A fellow yoga student, Suzanne, suggested that this is all just part of the process - perhaps not a planned part, but still. We can't take anything for granted, and we do have to take our focus and discipline into our own hands. A bunch of people are planning to drive to a nearby Bikram studio - the studio city location - for class tomorrow morning. I'm planning to tag along, because clearly I AM A JUNKIE. Like everybody else here.

This shift in perspective is kinda valuable - I think I'll be less inclined to find fault with the intensity of this process, now that I know how much I crave it in its absence. Plus - it makes the time seem longer - I still can't believe it's only been 4 days, it feels like a month.

Fortunately for all of us, Rob Schneider's "The Animal" is on the movie channels tonight - for FREE! Can you BELIEVE IT? I'm going to go savor the humor bounty...

1 comment:

Joe Ardent said...

We all agree that it would be most Horvathian for training to be cancelled. Then, you'd give up on yoga altogether, and say, "Clearly the Universe didn't want me to complete teacher training, because that is the only explanation for what happened, because it's all about me." I guess that last part would not be explicitly voiced, but we all would know the score.

But, really, we actually know at this moment that you'd say, "You know what? FUCK the Universe! I do what I want!" Then you'd find a way to finish the training anyway, even if you had to go camp out on Bikram's lawn in Beverly Hills. Maybe you could kill a garden snake or two, tan the hides, and present him with a snakeskin belt or something as a small token of your dedication. Surely, he could not refuse such an offer as that.